Gm, this is the doodhwala, the disprin of crypto newsletters 💊.

You can take us to cure all your problems — from a broken portfolio to a broken heart 🙃

Some MAD events happening this weekend, check it 👇

Here’s what we’re looking at today:

• JP Murugan 3 crypto HOT takes (#2 is 🤯)

• We’re officially in PUNK season

• Chaach and Charts: Lido is giving back!

• Milky Meme of the Day

LFG 🔥

JP Morgan’s 3 crypto HOT takes (#2 is 🤯)

So, JP Morgan (or JP Murugan as we call em) published a closed-door report about crypto, with some JUICY deets.

Well, the doodhwala got curious. 👀

And we managed to get our sticky hands (cuz of the lassi ofc) on this report.

Now, we spill the deets.

Here are 3️⃣ JP Murugan’s HOT takes on crypto rn:

1️⃣ We’re RISKY and FRISKY baby!

Since Terra Luna’s collapse and Do Kwon’s run from the law a few things are happening.

No, I’m not talking about crypto bros selling Lambos or their Rollies.

We’re talking about the end of deleveraging.

What’s deleveraging?

See, leveraging (or taking on hella debt) is what led to the collapse of SO MANY lending companies.

But JPM says deleveraging is over over because:

1. VCs continue to pour money into web3 companies: Between July — September 2022, VCs invested close to $15 billion in web3 companies (almost the same as last year, what 🐻 mkt?)

2. Big crypto companies are acquiring duds: FTX is in talks to scoop up Voyager 💀 and rumour has it they’re snapping Celius as well.

All praise our lord and saviour SBF 🙏

3. Pegged cryptos are back: For eg ETH <> staked ETH (issued via staking pools) which were off-peg are now back to holding their pegs (and the peg is as strong as a Patiala 😉)

2️⃣ Bitcoin is HELLA cheap!

While the in thing is proof of stake cryptos, the big daddy aka Bitcoin is still proof of work.

And it’s cheap to mine Bitcoin.

Over the past 3 months, BTC miners have been selling and so have Bitcoin miners.

This is what dragged the production price of Bitcoin from $20k in June to $15k in September.

woah woah woah, how tf do you measure the production price of Bitcoin?

💡 By the electricity used to mine Bitcoin and secure the Bitcoin network 💡

The production price is as low as our humor standards, but this price — $15k — is what JP Murugan is calling the “lower bound of bitcoin’s price range in a bear market.”

Or in simple words — the freaking bear bottom!!

3️⃣ Ethereum’s POS got some PROBs!

Now, idk if ya’ll know but Ethereum had a BIG breakup this month 💔

ETH broke up with its miners. I guess they couldn’t work out.

Look, there’s a lot at stake here. So we shouldn’t make jokes.

Instead, let’s focus on the main issues post-merge:

👉 since some PoW miners didn’t like the breakup they continued to mine ETH, creating ETHW or ETH PoW.

Like any bad breakup, this could cause a rift among mutual frens like users, devs, wallet providers, protocols, etc.

👉 over 60% of ETH staking happens through 5 parties (Lido, Coinbase, Binance, Kraken, Staked.US), leading to centralisation of PoS ETH

Phew!

That’s a lot of HOT TAKES on the crypto market, but it’s exciting times rn!

I gotta sit down, drink some hot doodh, and call my mom.

Fly MUSK - win $MATIC

Check out our favourite P2E games rn 👉Flappy Musk and Whack A Tate

You can win $MATIC by catching 🚬 and punching Tates

We’re officially in PUNK season

If anything confirms that NFT season is a 🟢 GO 🟢

It’s this!!

A CryptoPunk just went for 3.3k ETH or $4.5 million (Rs 36 crore)

The seller 👉 Daniel Maegaard, an NFT collector who goes by the name Seedphrase (that wasn’t hard to crack)

Man owns:

• 20 CryptoPunks

• 26 Meebits

• 3214 Axies

• 39 CryptoNobles

• 35 Hashmasks

• 5 Deadfren

• one-of-a-kind collectibles from artists like Banksy and Cozomo de' Medici

• AND 1 Crypto DickButt ofc

🤯

We found 2 of his wallets, this one, and this one with a total portfolio value of 3.6k ETH or nearly $5 million (Rs 40.7 crore)

In the last few days, his NFT portfolio value is up nearly 2x 🚀

Look at that go baby 🚀

We laughed while writing about a punk listed for 8.8k ETH.

But now it looks like we’re being punk’d and NFT season is upon us. 👀

The funny thing is, this is not the biggest CryptoPunk sale ever.

Not even close.

The biggest sale was in February, when Punk #6969…I mean, #5822 was sold for 8k ETH or $25 million at the time.

Since then, ETH and NFT prices have been in the 🚽

But sales like this give us FOMO for not buying an anti-semitic Ape or a profitable Punk last year for under $100 🥲

Oh well, you live and learn.

Like you learn erryday from the doodhwala.

Why! Thank you 🙏

Chaach and Charts: Lido is giving back!

Since ETH switched teams from PoW → PoS this DeFi protocol became SO much more important.

It’s Lido, a liquid staking aggregator for a bunch of cryptos, including ETH.

Lido is governed by a DAO 🤔 what that 👉 a decentralized autonomous organization.

And in the past 6 months, LidoDAO generated over $165 million in protocol revenue.

About 30% of that is in token rewards.

Milky Meme Of The Day

If you want more doodh then, be sure to follow our Twitter (@DoodhwalaDaily)

That’s all for today bhaiyo aur bheno! Naale Sigona!

Aakash "Dahi Cheeni" Athawasya & Arvind "Doodh Peda" Krishna

Yo! Our legal and financial advisors (aka our good ol’ conscience) have asked us to add this boring disclaimer.

None of what you read here is financial advice. We aren’t here to get you to buy or sell a crypto. We’re only here to tell you what’s up in crypto today and make you laugh. So, if you screwed up on a trade, that’s on you G. Stay safe in the markets.