🙏 Oh Rishi! Please be good to BTC

Gm. This is the doodhwala. The crypto newsletter that’s as easy to read as stealing a kaaju katli from a baby.

And please don't go around calling it ETH katli. It's cringe af. 🤮

You know what's not cringe tho? web3 meetups, so check out 👉 meetupswala.xyz for some BANGER meetups like this one.

Here’s the taaza delivery for today:

• How are the Big Money Bros doing?

• Oh Rishi! Please be good!

• Taaza Tweet Of The Day

• Milky Meme Of The Day

How are the Big Money Bros doing in the crypto winter?

Short answer: They are tanking.

Long answer: They are really really really really tanking. 😢

We looked at 3 Big Money Bros to see how the crypto winter might have affected their “web3 is the future bro” belief.

The 3 Big Money Bros are:

• Meta

• a16z

• Google

📱Meta

Let’s start with the company that has created social apps for every generation in your family. 👨‍👩‍👧‍👧

They have:

• Facebook for your Naana and Naani

• WhatsApp for your parents

• Instagram for you and your siblings

• They tried to buy Snapchat for the newborns but it didn’t go through 😕

Now, they have rebranded to META to bring your whole family to the Metaverse.

So how well are they doing in the bear market?

A 3 Billy (that’s billion in cool bro lingo) loss in the last quarter. That’s how they are doing. 📉

And this $3.7 billion loss is just from its one division- Reality Labs, their Metaverse division.

It’s the division that brought you this:

💰 a16z

One of the biggest funds in crypto, a16z, is also down 40% in this bear market.

Good to know that it’s not just the doodhwala’s $250 portfolio that’s tanking in this market. 🥲

a16z has close to $7.5 billion invested in crypto projects including some of your fav projects like:

• Uniswap

• Avalanche

• dydx

• Optimism

Last year, they invested in 26 companies in Q4.

This year, it’s just 9 in Q3. 🤯

But the market certainly doesn't seem to faze this Big Money Bro because they recently went in during the $165 million Series B raise of Uniswap.

That’s a16z. Throwin’ around money like money ain’t shit. 😎

🔍 Google

Although Google may not be directly involved with web3 or crypto yet, web3 companies are certainly involved with Google.

How? 🤨

Using the one thing you hate to watch during the nail-biting finish of an Ind v Pak Match- ADS.

Yes, crypto companies love ads. And they especially love ads on Google because it's cheaper than Facebook.

And in Q3, Google reported a loss of 6% in its earnings from ad revenue because of the crypto winter. 🥶

Very few crypto projects are running ads now and the ones that are doing so are either really huge projects with a lotta dough or they have no idea what they’re doing. 🤷‍♂️

Bear market is the time to BUIDL and it certainly seems like most of the projects are doing just that.

It's also good to see that these Big Money Bros are not giving up on crypto despite the downturn.

They are doing it either because they know there is a lot of money to be made or they actually believe in a decentralized future.

Whatever it may be, all hope is not lost in the crypto winter. 🙏

🙏 Oh Rishi! Please be good!

Indian parents’ expectations were raised this week.

First it was, “why can’t you bat like Virat Kohli?” 🏏

Then it was, “why can’t you lead a country like Rishi Sunak?” 💂🏽‍♀️

When will it ever be, “why can’t you be a crypto nobody like the doodhwala?” 🍼

In case you haven’t heard, the UK is set to get an Indian Prime Minister (”Indian” if you wanna call someone born in the UK to parents from Kenya and Tanzania, then yes iNdiAn).

That’s about as Indian as:

See Rishi was the Finance Minister of the UK, before his father told him, “Sharma-ji ka beta is the PM, why are you just the FM?” 🩴

So, he ran for the PM. 🤷‍♂️

Things weren’t as straightforward…but…err…he’s now the PM of the sixth-largest GDP in the world.

And rumor has it, crypto will be on his agenda. 👀

Here’s one POSITIVE and one NEGATIVE thing Rishi has said about crypto:

🟢 Positive — the SANDBOX 🟢

Back in April 2022 when Rishi was the FM, he came out in full support of the cryptocurrency industry, saying:

1. Stablecoins should be recognized as a form of payment

2. A “sandbox” for crypto companies to innovate should be created

3. The UK tax system should be reformed to help the crypto industry (esp. DeFi lending)

He even bought up the idea of the Royal Mint (the thing that makes the UK’s coins) launching an NFT.

Damn, that’s an NFT I’d like to mint 🤣

Man was gushing about crypto the way my mother gushed about me when I got an A+ in my Math exam back in 2nd standard.

🔴 Negative — the BritCOIN 🔴

In December 2021, Rishi was like “screw Bitcoin, give me that Britcoin.”

When the UK was heading the G7, man launched a “set of public policy principles for a retail central bank digital currency (CBDC)”

Basically, they wrote a 27-page document on why a central bank-issued digital currency is a good thing.

Nothing has been launched but here are the facts:

• would be a retail CBDC (used by you and me)

• would work with cash and bank deposits

• would be used to prevent illicit finance

On one hand, our brown munda is promoting crypto companies, on the other he’s promoting a CBDC.

He’s like that Punjabi who speaks with a thick English accent.

We’re not sure if he’s with us or against us.

I guess time will tell!

Taaza Tweet Of The Day

Milky Meme of the day

If you want more doodh then, be sure to follow our Twitter (@DoodhwalaDaily)

That’s all for today bhaiyo aur bheno! Naale Sigona!

Aakash "Dahi Cheeni" Athawasya & Arvind "Doodh Peda" Krishna

Yo! Our legal and financial advisors (aka our good ol’ conscience) have asked us to add this boring disclaimer.

None of what you read here is financial advice. We aren’t here to get you to buy or sell a crypto. We’re only here to tell you what’s up in crypto today and make you laugh. So, if you screwed up on a trade, that’s on you G. Stay safe in the markets.