💔 Some Bitcoin breakups are hard, some are easy

Vannakam dear degens! This is your Doodhwala, we’re like that nice shopkeeper that gives you an extra Kacha Mango Bite with every purchase.

Here’s your order for the day:

• My man’s breaking up with his girl over a crypto scam

• Baba Bitcoin is stepping down as CEO

• An 8-year old Bitcoin big boy is back

• Tweet of the day

My man’s breaking up with his girl over a crypto scam

“Give me 10 lakhs, I’ll give you some Bitcoin.”

You’re smart enough to not fall for ☝️ such a scam right? Probably because you read the Doodhwala erryday.

Well some people don’t and that’s the reason why they fall for such scams.

We found this hilarious reddit post about this dude complaining about his girlfriend falling for a scam like this. The act was so “stupid,” he wants to break up with her.

So, what exactly went down?

• She signed up for a Twitter giveaway

• The Twitter account said she won 50 BTC ($1.1 million or Rs 9 crore)

• Put in her credit card details

• The scammers stole $14.5k (Rs 11 lakhs)

Aiyooo

The funny/sad part is most of the money stolen was not her’s, it was her parents’ and her boyfriend’s.

Even after her funds got stolen for a giveaway she won, she still thinks the crypto is “on hold.”

Talk about having an Alia Bhatt moment 🤦🏽‍♀️

She even plans to ring up the FBI to help her get her $14.5k and the 50 BTC she was “promised.”

Someone please tell her the FBI does not stand for “Free Bitcoin Instantly.”

My man’s so pissed that he wants to break up with her.

This news is sad and funny all at the same time. You know who you are if you sympathize or lol, we’re definitely the latter. #Sorrynotsorry

There’s also a scam running around where accounts claiming to be distressed students DM you about retrieving USDT stuck in their wallets.

This is what they look like.

Obvi, they’re pretending to be students like SRK in Main Hoon Na.

Doodhwala’s take: If a Twitter bot is giving you free crypto, it’s probably a scam. Don’t fall for it. Stay safe, keep your private keys…well…private.

Baba Bitcoin is stepping down as CEO

MicroStrategy.

It is a company that most of us had never heard of or cared about until 2020, even though they have been existence for over 30 years.

(Anybody who says they knew about it or have been “following” it is straight-up lying)

In August 2022, the company famously announced they are stacking Bitcoin like how SRK is stacking up love letters from his female fans.

That’s when we actually googled MicroStrategy and found out it wasn't a company under Microsoft.

MicroStrategy is a software intelligence company co-founded by Michael Saylor in 1989 and went public in 1998.

He has been the CEO since the beginning but yesterday, it was announced that he is stepping down and taking up the role of Executive Chairman.

Is it because the company has been down by almost a billion dollars since it first bought Bitcoin?

Who knows. Maybe.

But one thing is certain, our man was fully focused on talking about Bitcoin than MicroStrategy operations.

This is what Saylor had to say before the board meeting.

I felt that. ✊

He is to Bitcoin what Baba Ramdev is to Patanjali.

Every Bitcoin podcast, event, show, and magazine wanted him on.

Maybe the MicroStrategy board decided that it's best he focused on their Bitcoin acquisition while someone else led corporate operations.

MicroStrategy, however, hasn't indicated that they would be selling any of the 129,669 Bitcoin they own.

They believe it to be a great long-term investment and they definitely love being part of the #HODLGang with the Doodhwala.

An 8-year old Bitcoin big boy is back

A big miner moved a TON of Bitcoin after 8 years.

But it’s not all bad, like turning milk into paneer, we’ll tell you why.

Quick info on what a Bitcoin miner is:

If a wallet is dormant (like Kumbhakarna during his naps), the Bitcoin in the wallet is considered “lost.” This can be because someone forgot the keys to the wallet, or threw it in a dumpster years ago.

So, when dormant wallets with loads of Bitcoin move, people take notice.

Just how much BTC was in it?

Oh not much, just 1,100 BTC worth $25 million (Rs 200 crore).

No big deal, honestly. 😤

So, who moved it?

A retired mining pool (a group of miners) named Ghash.

We did some digging, and found that Ghash accounted for 42% of Bitcoin’s mining power in 2014.

If one mining pool holds 42% of mining power, the decentralized currency is…well…not very decentralized.

To decrease its power, miners voiced concerns and eventually moved away from Ghash. (like I moved away from Kurkure after I heard about the “plastic” rumours, IYKYK)

But this wasn’t before Ghash racked up 1,100 BTC, which it didn’t move for 8 years.

Until now.

The good thing is Ghash did not move this Bitcoin to an exchange. Because if they did, chances are they would be dumping it for 2,800% profit.

Could you imagine the chaos if $25 million worth Bitcoin was sold in one shot? That’s like Sallu bhai, SRK, and Aamir Khan each dropping a movie on the same Friday!

Tweetshot of the day

That’s all for today bhaiyo aur bheno! Naale Sigona!

Aakash "Dahi Cheeni" Athawasya & Arvind "Doodh Peda" Krishna

Yo! Our legal and financial advisors (aka our good ol’ conscience) have asked us to add this boring disclaimer.

None of what you read here is financial advice. We aren’t here to get to buy or sell a crypto. We’re only here to tell you what’s up in crypto today and make you laugh. So, if you screwed up on a trade, that’s on you G. Stay safe in the markets.