🤦‍♂️ FTX is back in the news...AGAIN!

Today’s doodhwala is brought to you by Pyse – a real-world green assets investing platform on the blockchain.

Gm, this is the doodhwala, the crypto newsletter that doesn't settle for anything but the best. 🔥

Best news, best doodh and best readers! ❤️

Here’s the best news for today:

• 🤦‍♂️ Ah Shiit…Here We Go Again: FTX is back in the news with some good news and bad news

• 😅 Mario Malware: Everyone’s beloved game is coming after your crypto and your webcam images

• 🚀 Zoom Goes zkSync! Can’t stop this zk train from going to the moon

• 🛠 Resourcewala: WTF is a Keeper in Blockchain Networks?

• 🍼 Doodhshots: World’s first Chief Walking Officer has been hired

😱 Yet another crypto shocker!

FTX.

The once-loved digital exchange platform, that stole our hearts (and apparently our money). 💸

But hang on... didn't they crash and burn? 😅

Yeah, they did. And guess what they left behind? 💥

An outstanding tab of $8.7 billion owed to their customers! 💸

Looks like they've been throwing one hell of a party with other people's money. 🍻

In simple words, they mixed up customer deposits with corporate funds, and then used them for, well, let's just say not for what they were intended. 🎭

The whistle-blower in this drama was a team from FTX itself, who've been playing crypto-detectives, searching through the wreckage of the failed exchange. 🕵️‍♂️

Their report dropped like a bomb on Monday. 💣

Here’s what the scene looked like: 💔

FTX owed its customers a whopping $8.7 billion.

About $6.4 billion was in the form of good ol' cash and stablecoins.

Did they accidentally trip and fall into this mess? Nah!

FTX top dogs had been in on it since August 2022.

The FTX team has managed to recover about $7 billion so far. 💪

And they still have hopes for more. 🙏

But, what happened to the customer-centric digital age leader, FTX? 🚀

Turns out, it was all smoke and mirrors. 🌫

Right from the start, FTX treated customer deposits like their personal piggy bank. 🐷

And this wasn't an accident.

The top execs, directed this reckless joyride. 🎢

According to the report, these execs were not only making it rain with customer funds, but they were also playing a global game of hide-and-seek. 🌍

They bounced FTX Group from the U.S. to Hong Kong to the Bahamas, trying to dodge the law enforcement spotlight. 🚔

• Misleading banks and auditors

• Forging documents

• Lying

These things ☝️seemed to be part of their job description. 🤥

Fast-forward to today, FTX filed for bankruptcy in Delaware. 🏳️

But wait, there's a twist. 🔄

There's chatter about a possible rebirth of the operations under the name FTX 2.0. 🤔

Can you imagine tracing the convoluted transactions of FTX? Yeah, neither can they. 🤯

According to the report, senior execs, including a certain Caroline Ellison, knew in August 2022 that FTX was in over its head. 😲

Did they come clean? Nope!

They created a faux customer account on to hide the missing billions. 😈

This "Korean friend’s account" supposedly owed FTX $8.9 billion.

It wasn't just the customers they fooled.

FTX misled its banking partners too, blurring the line between customer funds and their own. 😱

Their ex-CEO, Bankman-Fried, even fibbed to senators about their customer protection practices. 😡

Well, FTX, your party may have been a blast, but the hangover is sure gonna sting! 🍾🤕

Doodhwala’s Take:

FTX’s bankruptcy gave us more drama than an entire season of Game of Thrones. 👏

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🥲 Mario’s-A-Doing-Something-Illegal-Ah

Everybody’s favourite Italian friends are back!

This time with a CRYPTO update.

But it’s not what you think. 🥲

And no, it's not an airdrop. 🤦‍♂️

Yup, we are talking about Super Mario Bros!

So what’s going on? 🤔

A long-running fan version of Nintendo’s Super Mario called Super Mario Forever has found itself in deep trouble.

Rumour has it that this game is not just about jumping on mushrooms and saving princesses anymore. 🥲

Apparently, it's hiding some sneaky malware that can take control of your crypto wallets and even install crypto mining software. 😅

Talk about unexpected power-ups. 🤦‍♂️

Quick facts about this fan-inspired game:

→ Launched in 2004 on the popular and free Softendo website ✅

→ Garnered 17 million downloads from that website alone ✅

→ Has nothing to do with the official game by Nintendo ✅

A report by Cyble Research & Intelligence Labs stated that whenever a user downloads the game, it does 3️⃣ things.

And out of this, the user only knows about ONE. 😅

1️⃣ Installs the actual game

The user knows about this, ofc. 🤷‍♂️

2️⃣ Installs XMR Miner

A software that quietly runs a Monero (XMR) cryptocurrency miner in the background. 😅

Yeah, Monero is the famed privacy coin that hides transaction details from the public. (there’s a joke in there somewhere)

This mining software takes away the user’s computing resources for the benefit of the scammer, who’s actually making the money from this process. 😬

3️⃣ Installs Umbral Stealer

Its “a lightweight and efficient information stealer.” (no biggie 🤷‍♂️)

This is created to steal: 👇

• passwords

• webcam images

• crypto wallet information

• your favourite doodhwala’s info

This has been a nightmare for all the Mario lovers.

Who would have thought a fun game where two Italian plumbers fight turtles and mushrooms to save the princess would turn into a scammer's favourite way to attack? 🥲

Gotta stay safe out there, folks! 😬

Cuz’ everybody wants some crypto and some doodh. 😅

📈 Cheese and Charts: zkSync Zooms Ahead! 🚀

Remember when zkSync was just an ambitious project on the horizon?

Well, now it's time to roll out the red carpet because zkSync has officially arrived at the big leagues. 🌟

Just in the past 6 months, zkSync has

• Locked up $645M in Total Value Locked (TVL) 📊

• Racked up 1M unique depositing addresses 📈

Why this sudden influx, THO?

Well, it could be due to the potential airdrop that's got everyone and their crypto grandma depositing on the network. 🎁

Onto the competition.

Although Polygon zkEVM did show some muscle growth last month, it's like comparing a newbie gym-goer to Arnold (drink doodh no matter who you are).🥛

zkSync led the pack in terms of daily active addresses, transactions, and TVL, keeping zkEVM in its shadow.

Let's get down to the numbers:

• Polygon zkEVM TVL: $43.5M 📊

• Polygon zkEVM Unique Depositing Addresses: 51K 📈

I know it’s nothing compared to zkSync, but Rome wasn’t built in a day bro.

zkSync or zkEVM: Who's going to win this Layer 2 race? 🏁🤔

(REPLY and let us know 👇)

🛠 Resourcewala: WTF is a Keeper in Blockchain Networks?

Okay, so you've got the blockchain hype, you're dabbling in some DeFi, NFTs are your new Pokemon cards, but have you heard about the unsung heroes - the Keepers? 🧐

Everyone seems to be low-key ignoring them while they’re out there keeping the whole network afloat.

Ain't that a bit unfair, fam? 😢

So let's change that, and give Keepers the limelight they deserve.

Today's resource serves you the freshest facts on a platter:

• What are Keepers?

• Why are they essential for blockchain networks?

• How do they function?

🍼 Doodhshots: World’s First Chief Walking Officer (CWO)

• ⛔️ Bear Market Rug: Chibi Finance rug pulls $1 Million in crypto from Arbitrum users and deposits it into the crypto mixer Tornado Cash.

• 🥲 Firing Squad: Robinhood announces workforce reduction of 7% in recent restructuring. Approximately 150 employees are slated to lose their jobs.

• 🚶‍♂️Chief Walking Officer: Move-to-earn fitness app Sweat Economy has appointed the new Chief Walking Officer (CWO), Bence Tamás, a 21-year-old Hungarian. What’s the JD?

• 💰$1 Million, Baby! Etherscriptions, the tokens with Ordinal-like features on Ethereum experience explosive volume, surpassing $1 million.

• 🤑 Funding Szn: Mythical Games secures an impressive $37 million in Series C1 funding round. The CEO hopes to use the funds to finally make a profit.

🤣 Milky Meme Of The Day

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That’s all for today folks! See ya tomorrow!

Yo! Our legal and financial advisors (aka our good ol’ conscience) have asked us to add this boring disclaimer. None of what you read here is financial advice. We aren’t here to get you to buy or sell crypto. We’re only here to tell you what’s up in crypto today and make you laugh. So, if you screwed up on a trade, that’s on you G. Stay safe in the markets.

Today’s edition was brought to you by Ritik Gupta and Sumanth

Edited by: Arvind Krishna and Aakash Athawasya

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